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A strong, confident, powerful, playful female. She is an intellectual who is often misunderstood by BETA and lessor males, and to some DOMINANT males as well. She is a loner, never runs in a pack, and is a boss in her own right. She controls every aspect of her life to the rest of the world, but will drop to her knees and devote her life for the love of her one true Dominant. To a certain extent…winks. (Never did I say I would be easy)

I Will Be – Christina Aguilera

Please note there is some French language in the contents of this post. I will not apologize for it.

A few months back, I took that BDSM test that you can find online. While a few things surprised me, most did not. I am a switch, vanilla, a rope bunny, a rigger, submissive, Primal (Prey), Dominant, experimentalist, and a Brat. All in that order from 100% down to 12%. So I have submissive tendencies. This was not news to me. But could I survive and flourish in a D/s relationship?

My first experience with a Dominant could be considered an epic failure. My Dom was a mature gentleman, experienced, and set in his ways, though he had a kind heart, and he made me laugh. I did grow to care for him. But, shh, don’t tell him that. There were just a few things I was not going to do. In fact, a few of those were hard limits for me.

Nevertheless, having this overwhelming urge to submerge myself in this role compelled me to forge ahead. I warned him that he may curse the day he ever met me. We might even kill one another. I WARNED HIM. I just don’t follow orders blindly. I question everything. I voice my opinion forcibly. You want me to what? Nope, not gonna happen, sir. Sir, that is unacceptable to me. He said; eventually, I would succumb. I thought, newp, never in a million years.

I had no issue calling him sir, wearing his collar, kneeling, going pantiless, and letting him undress and dress me AT HOME. I did take issue with kneeling, going pantiless, being nude, and leashed IN PUBLIC. Nope, never, ever. I would succumb; eventually, he said. Being me, I laughed inwardly. No way, Jose.

Now please understand this was not a sexual D/s relationship. No, no sex involved. I was content with that. Did I need my head examined? No. I wasn’t interested in any sex either. So it was a win, win for us both.

We were going through my extensive closet one day. I had 215 outfits already made up and in my appearance tab that I was showing him. I do have very specific tastes regarding what I will wear. Out of 30, he rejected 15 ensembles. Not too shabby. Besides, I put together these outfits, so I love them all. No biggy. It came to light that he loved florals and had been shown a particular dress he was enamored with. We went to the store, and I picked up the DEMO and returned to my region. It was a pretty enough dress. I use the term dress loosely here. While it was very short in front, barely covering my V, the whole backside was missing. My full ass was hanging out for all the world to see. You want me to wear this, this thing out in public, I sputtered? No panties, you say? Ain’t no fucking way, sir. Absolutely not ever. While I figuratively show my ass in public from time to time and in photographs, I was not going to do so literally and in public of all places. Been there, done that, sold the T-shirt. I just will not do it. With that, he said he was done for the night and logged out. After much thought, I fired off a message saying I would concede and wear this piece of fabric at home in private for him. Shrugs. I thought that was generous on my part 🙂

The following day when I logged in, I had a message stating that we would agree to disagree. That there is no such thing as a conservative submissive. Well, there is now, sir 🙂 Anyways, he is withdrawing before someone got hurt, he said. After many starts and stops to this relationship I was not going to fight for this any longer. We are both strong personalities, set in our ways, and unwilling to budge on what we want and what we will do. No harm, no foul. I wish him nothing but good things.

The Dominant, for me, is out there somewhere. Who knows where this path may lead? I’ll continue to walk it anyway.

Be kind to one another. Till we meet again♥

What is she wearing?

For information on bento mesh body, bento mesh head and their respective accessories please see My Favorite Things.

Doux: Seulgi Hairstyle

Ysoral: Luxe Piercing and Chain Cerise

EarthStones: Belly Gems, Celtic Claddagh Ring

Zerkalo: Persian Rugs Reds Adult

{MP} Modern Primitive: Bracelets (a) Pose Modified with Animare – This is a pose made for a male but I am a tall avatar so it works for me. Besides, the kneeling poses for women are awful in my opinion. Even the ones in collars. They really need to update them to bento. Now if anyone knows of some decent Kajira poses that are bento for women shoot me a LM please.